Girl in the Bedouin Tent Page 9
Not that he’d seen much of his parents. They’d had no time for their son. They’d been too engrossed in pursuing the increasingly elusive ‘good times’ they had lived for.
‘Why weren’t you well regarded?’ Cassie’s soft voice tugged him back to the present.
Amir looked into searching eyes and felt a surprising urge to talk. His personal life was a topic he never discussed, even though much of it was on public record.
‘I was surrounded by scandal from the moment I was born. No, before I was born.’ He watched her move and pretended to survey the board when it was Cassie he wanted to watch. ‘My father was the black sheep of the family. You name it, he tried it, from squandering his fortune through gambling to embezzling public funds.’
‘You’re kidding!’
Amir shook his head. ‘He relied on his older brother to bail him out of strife and cover up for him. And he was right—the old Sheikh would have done anything to ensure he didn’t face imprisonment. That would have brought shame on the family. In the end my father lived on a very generous stipend provided by his brother.’
‘So he could afford the resorts?’
‘And more. He was a womanizer, a party animal. The only reason he married my mother was because she was pregnant with his baby.’
‘At least he married her.’
Amir watched something flicker in Cassie’s eyes and remembered what she’d said about her parents not being married. About her father living with his other family.
It sounded hard, but if her father had been like his perhaps her experience was the better option.
Slowly he nodded. ‘It was the one responsible thing he did in his life. To his family’s horror, though, he married a lingerie model with a slum upbringing and a reputation for kiss-and-tell affairs.’ His smile was a tight twist of the lips. ‘Not what the Tarakhan royal family had hoped for.’
‘I’ll bet not.’ Cassie sat back, the chessboard forgotten.
‘The fact that they died together from an overdose of illegal drugs at an out-of-control party only made things worse.’
‘Oh, Amir! I’m so sorry.’
He leaned across to take another of her pieces. He didn’t need sympathy. He’d barely known his parents and hadn’t missed them. If anything, the move to Tarakhar had been a blessed relief, despite his uncle’s rules and regimen.
‘It was a long time ago. But the point is when I arrived everyone looked sideways at me. My uncle expected me to turn out like my father—unstable and irresponsible. Everyone else followed his lead.’
‘That’s so unfair!’
‘Who said life was fair?’ He paused. ‘Maybe knowing everyone expected me to fail was what gave me to strength to keep trying. To succeed.’
Amir kept his voice light, but memories reinforced the promise he’d long ago made to himself. No children of his would suffer as he’d done, because of his parents’ scandalous behaviour. They wouldn’t wear the badge of shame for something they couldn’t change.
He would protect them as he’d never been protected. He had it all mapped out. Nothing would be left to chance.
He watched Cassie’s slim fingers move a chess piece rather than let himself seek out her gaze.
‘Surely your uncle could have given you the benefit of the doubt? You were just a kid.’
‘My uncle was a decent man, but after a lifetime bailing his brother out of trouble his patience had worn thin. He spent years waiting for me to show the same traits as my father.’
‘But you didn’t.’
She said it with such certainty that Amir lifted his gaze to her still face. Something gleamed in the depths of her eyes. Something warm and reassuring. Something that, crazily, for this moment, he wanted to hang on to.
‘I’m no saint, Cassie. I haven’t always stuck to the straight and narrow.’
Cassie looked away from his dark eyes. They discussed him, yet she felt he saw too much of what she usually kept to herself.
Like the shiver of excitement inside when their eyes met. Like the feeling of connection to this man who was still virtually a stranger.
Yet, hearing about his childhood, she couldn’t help but notice the similarities between them. Neither had been wanted as children—definitely in her case, and reading between the lines she’d guess in Amir’s as well. Both were children of parents intent on their own pleasure. Both shadowed by the shame of their parents’ behaviour. Both ostracised by others because of that.
Both alone.
‘I’m not surprised you rebelled. It’s a natural response.’ She watched him move again, closing the trap around her king.
His movements were mesmerising. Or was it that she’d fallen under his spell? She hung on his words, addicted to the deep timbre of his voice. She watched him move whenever she could, enjoying his lithe grace and athleticism.
She’d bet anything part of his rebellion had been seducing women. Was he a playboy like his father?
Amir had charm when he wanted to exert it, and that dry, self-deprecating humour was far too attractive. Not to mention the sizzle in his eyes when he’d spoken of wanting her. Her pulse revved at the thought.
But most of all it was his aloofness, the sense that he stood alone, that intrigued. It made Cassie want to wrap her arms around him and draw him close. Learn what lay behind that guarded expression and comfort him.
Surely if anything was needed to prove her reaction to him was foolish that was it? As if Amir wanted comfort! She’d never met anyone so self-contained.
Despite what he’d said about desiring her, he’d been nothing but honourable. Protective. A man to rely on.
‘Did you rebel too?’ His voice came soft and low, feathering across her senses.
‘Not so much rebel as escape. Acting was how I got away when things were difficult. I could escape to another world, be who I wanted to be. I could be funny or tragic. I could act out my emotions and blot out what was happening around me.’
‘Sounds like it was tough.’
Cassie looked up and found he’d leaned closer, his look intent. Her skin drew tight in a flurry of tingles and she had to concentrate on not gulping in air too fast. When he looked at her like that all she could think of was him saying he wanted her.
It became difficult to remember why she should hold back. ‘I got by. I grew strong.’
It took all her willpower to break his gaze and look down at the board. For a moment she couldn’t make sense of it, had lost track of the strategy she’d chanced against him. Then, in a moment of clarity, she remembered.
Cassie couldn’t prevent the tiny smile that curled her lips as she moved her queen, then looked up into his stunned face. ‘Checkmate.’
Cassie stretched voluptuously, in her half-asleep state enjoying the hazy sensation of bone-deep comfort. Had she ever felt this relaxed, this cosy?
She rubbed her cheek against the pillow, warm and cushioned and so slightly abrasive.
Frowning, she pulled herself higher. Pillows should be soft, shouldn’t they? No matter. This was deliciously warm and—’Cassie.’
She felt Amir’s voice rumble through her. How did he do that? ‘Hmm?’
‘I think you should move.’
She shook her head, burrowing closer into the spice-scented heat of the bed. She didn’t want to move. Didn’t want him to talk and wake her fully.
Lying here half dreaming was bliss.
‘Cassie.’ This time she felt the word like a purr passing through her torso.
‘No.’ Fretfully she turned her head, clinging to the remnants of sleep. She had nowhere to go, had she? He was the one who left this wonderful bed each morning to go out, leaving her prey to boredom and worry.
‘You need to move.’
‘Why?’ Just a few minutes more. Just—
‘Because …’ He muttered under his breath and Cassie felt the last vestiges of sleep slide away. ‘Because of this.’
Large hands settled on her upper arms and hauled her higher. S
tartled, she snapped open her mouth to protest, opening her eyes at the same time.
She had a moment’s confused impression of a heated black gaze and then something brushed her mouth. Something soft and warm and inviting.
Instantly realisation hit. She was in bed with Amir. Not in bed, safely curled on the far side of the wide mattress, but in bed, lying sprawled over him!
It was his bare chest beneath her that generated the heat she’d snuggled into.
His lips slid against hers again in a gentle caress. Her eyes flickered shut as he slipped the tip of his tongue into her mouth in a light foray that made every sense leap.
She clung tight as he thrust further, bringing delight with every slow, lush move of his tongue against hers. Heat coiled inside as rivulets of sensation spread through her, merging and rising into a floodtide of pleasure.
She shouldn’t enjoy this. She shouldn’t respond. But she did. It was what she’d experienced in those fitful dreams these past few days, and so much more.
With a sigh she sank down into Amir, tilting her head to allow better access to her mouth, answering his kiss with her own demands.
His broad chest was beneath her own, his hot skin bare to her touch. She lay half across him, her right leg on his right, his bunched muscles exciting. The long cotton shirt she wore was no barrier between them. The sensation of skin on skin, of her softness against his hardness, incited a heady thrill she’d never experienced.
He moved, wrapped one arm around her waist, cupped her face in his splay-fingered hand, and she almost moaned her pleasure aloud. His touch was proprietorial and she revelled in it.
Of its own volition her mouth mimicked his, her tongue dipping into his mouth and discovering his delicious taste.
Deeper, deeper the kiss grew. Her senses swirled in heady delight as she fell into the sensuous give and take.
Cassie had been kissed before. On stage she’d scored more than her fair share of kisses, from quick pecks to lavish seductions. Away from the stage there’d been men too. Some she’d even encouraged as she’d tried to shake off her fears and her ingrained distaste. But it had never worked. No one had broken through the mental barriers she’d erected and strengthened with every passing year.
Those barriers had kept her from giving herself to a man.
No one had ever swept her away on a wave of pleasure till her mind refused to engage and all she could do was feel. Until now.
Amir’s taste, spicy and dark and male, filled her senses. It mingled with the fresh, clean scent of his skin. Not like hers but intriguingly different and desirable. Unique.
His touch was tender but his body was hard, inciting a terrible longing that made Cassie shift restlessly and lean closer.
His hand moved up, threading through her hair, and she thought she’d die of pleasure. It was a massage so seductive, attuned to the deepening rhythm of their kiss and the rising need within her.
Cassie wanted more. She spread her hands over Amir’s shoulders, stroking the hot silk of his skin over rigid muscle and bone. She lifted a hand to his jaw, fascinated by the tiny abrasive film of stubble that felt so satisfyingly rough to her palm and tickled the corner of her mouth.
He shifted and the friction of his solid chest against her breasts notched tension within her. An urgency built, making her move fretfully, demanding more.
Amir gave it. In a single surge he gripped her close and rolled her onto her back. Cassie revelled in the sense of him propped half over her, blanketing out the world. His mouth worked magic, making her head spin.
His hand strayed to her jaw, her throat, and a delicate shudder ripped through her at his butterfly-light caress.
Her heart hammered to a new, urgent tattoo as she willed his hand lower, for the first time wanting, needing a man’s touch on her breast.
Her skin tingled and her blood roared. Deep inside something loosened: a tightness, a constriction she’d never noticed. Cassie felt free, wonderfully alive, breathless with anticipation.
‘Please,’ she whispered against his mouth, hardly knowing what she wanted except that it was more.
A moment later his warm hand cupped her breast. Delicious heat shot through her. She moved restlessly and his hold tightened. A deep growl of masculine pleasure vibrated through her and he shifted his weight.
His fingers flexed again, but this time Cassie felt no pleasure, only a sudden suffocating fog.
A flutter of unease stirred and her eyes snapped open. He loomed huge above her in the half-dark.
The tantalising pleasure of Amir’s kiss bled away. In its place erupted choking fear.
She was helpless against the strength of this big, powerful man. Abruptly, from the depths of her subconscious, came the memory of being pinioned to a door, fondled by the man who’d just emerged from her mother’s bedroom. She could almost hear his hoarse chuckle as she writhed in his hold.
Somehow the hot, clean scent of Amir’s skin was obliterated by the sour tang of sweat, wine and musky aftershave.
Bile rose and Cassie’s stomach cramped in fear.
She had to get out, draw breath. But she couldn’t break his hold.
A sob of terror rose in her throat as she shoved at those rigid shoulders. She kicked fruitlessly, hampered by the unyielding form above her.
Suddenly she was free. She scrambled to the far side of the bed, gasping desperate breaths as she pulled her knees high and wrapped her arms around them.
Finally, when the miasma lifted, she turned her head. Amir sat hunched on the other side of the bed, one hand thrust through his crisp dark hair. His shoulders rose and fell as he dragged in deep breaths and she spied tiny crimson marks there. Scratches where she’d dug her nails in as she’d frantically tried to shift him.
Cassie’s breath froze.
What had happened? One moment she’d been eager for Amir. The next, claustrophobic fear had risen and flung her into panicked resistance.
‘Are you all right?’
He’d swung round. Dark eyes full of concern held hers.
Silently she nodded, unable to find her voice.
She trembled all over, suddenly cold though seconds ago she’d been burning with desire and the heat of Amir’s body against hers.
‘I …’ His hand slashed through the air—in a gesture of frustration or anger? She couldn’t tell. ‘Don’t look at me like that, Cassie!’
He surged to his feet and strode across the dimly lit room away from her. A moment later he’d grabbed a long cloak and whirled it round his shoulders.
When he turned his face was set like stone, though his eyes held a febrile glitter.
‘I apologise.’ He took half a step towards her then stopped. ‘That won’t happen again. I thought you wanted—’ He shook his head. ‘You are safe.’
Guilt rose in Cassie. She had wanted. She’d wanted so badly.
‘It’s not your fault.’ Her voice emerged husky from her constricted throat. ‘I …’
The words died as he turned away, the cloak flaring around him.
‘Sleep now, Cassie. No one will disturb you.’ Then he marched from the room, barefoot but impossibly regal. Cassie was left alone with her thoughts. She’d never craved company more.
CHAPTER NINE
GRAVEL bit into his bare feet as he stalked across the dawn-lit compound but Amir barely registered the pain.
Instead it was the recollection of Cassie’s fear that gripped him. The glazed horror in her eyes when he’d broken their kiss had shocked him.
How had he got it so wrong?
Yes, she’d been barely awake when he’d tried to make her move.
Yes, he’d been aroused, and all too ready to let his body do the thinking as he’d lain, tormented, beneath her sumptuously feminine body.
Yes, he’d known he shouldn’t, but he’d been unable to resist kissing her, deepening the kiss as she’d responded.
He’d read her plea as an invitation to pleasure, believing she felt the same simmering desir
e that had short-circuited his brain. He’d deluded himself into thinking she wanted him as much as he wanted her.
How had he not heard instantly the desperation in her voice? How had he misinterpreted what must have been a plea for escape as a throaty-voiced request for seduction?
Bitter recriminations filled his head and guilt slashed a jagged slice through his belly.
He reached an outcrop of bare rock on the edge of camp and stood, watching the fingers of dawn light spread down from the mountain towards Tarakhar.
If only they were there now. Cassie would be cared for and comfortable as she recuperated from her ordeals. She wouldn’t have to share accommodation with a man who, despite his vaunted control, had almost taken far more than he should have.
Amir was sick to his stomach at the thought of what he’d almost done.
He recalled Cassie’s desperation that first night. The fear in her voice as she’d related how she’d expected to be assaulted at any moment. How he’d reassured her she was safe with him.
A bitter laugh escaped him.
Safe?
The horror in her wide eyes moments ago told its own tale.
Two more days till their scheduled departure. Two days during which she’d fear he’d make a move on her. Two days in which he wouldn’t sleep for fear of waking again to a situation he couldn’t control.
He couldn’t do it.
He swung round and strode back across the camp. With a supreme effort he might just be able to finalise the work he’d come here to do in one day. Then they’d only have one night to get through. Surely one more night was possible?
Cassie lay in the massive bed, unable to sleep. She hadn’t seen Amir since dawn.
Now she heard laughter and music on the night air. There must be a feast in the main tent tonight. As guest of honour Amir would attend.
Why did it hurt so much that he’d avoided her all day?
She was frantic to explain he wasn’t to blame. To wipe away the guilt she’d read on his face as he’d looked at her with shock pinching his features.
The soft brush of his lips had been an invitation to pleasure, not a demand. It had been her plea for more that had galvanised him into action, as she’d thought she wanted.